Be Yourself & Be YOU!

 2o22.o8.3o - just another cherry tree update  🍒  They keep getting bigger :)  So excited ! They got more leaves and taller. Stronger stems also . I think they like it being cold inside my house , google said that your supposed to plant the seeds in the winter and they should sprout in the spring 🤔 . I don't see why the stem is turning red tho .  I'm learning about cherry treese as they get bigger.  🍒  Top view of the one above  🍒  Top view of the one below  🍒  SO EXCITED 😊 

 2o22.o8.3o Well ... I jinxed it ,  Catina & Terry now have the symptoms I did when I first got sick . (Sore back , chills , fever and can't really stay awake or stomach anything)  Just hope Timmy,  Alisha and Isla don't catch it . I'm sorry 😞  Who knew it was contagious .  I didn't .   Because I was in the livingroom room and nobody was getting sick .  Maybe I should of been in my bedroom . I just didn't want to be alone lol  ...  On another note ... Here's Isla a couple years ago playing Isla playing with the big bucket of blocks .. I believe she was playing with Alisha but she didn't pop up in my #TimeHop  ✌️ 

 2o22.o8.28 Catina and Ali gave Nelly a flea bath ,  I heard Nelly meowing from upstairs all the way downstairs so I went up and helped . It sounded like she was saying "no"  Suprised Nelly didn't scratch us . All she tried to do was jump out of the tub . But other then that she was really good 👍  Got all the fleas off her , but ended up putting the flea coller back on her for a few more days because we have to take the carpets to the car wash and spray them down . I told Nelly "wouldn't have to have a bath if you wouldn't go outside and hide under the porch"  all she did was meow back at me  😆  Alisha holding Nelly for a couple mins to calm her down , she was shaking like crazy and hissing at Luna (Terry's dog) 🐈  🐈‍⬛️ 

 2o22.o8.23 - a beautiful accident 😍  I noticed we had a strawberry bush growing back in June 2o22 in our compost bucket ,  I didn't take any other pictures of it because I thought it wouldn't survive . June 13th 2o22 Then ,  Today me and my kids went outside to play in the back yard for a little bit .  I looked in the compost buckets and saw how big the strawberry was getting and its getting HUGE ! I thought it was big enough to transfer it into its own container so it don't take all the nutrients out of the container its already in .  So I did that ...  This is what it looks like RIGHT now !  This is after I transplanted it into a different container This is what the strawberry looked like BEFORE I decided to transplant it . Didn't notice it at first because it blended in with the weeds , Catina helped me lift it out of there 💪  Hoping it don't die :)  Kind of curious on how big these berries get because they are from the store , did...

 2o22.o8.21  Today was long and stressful .  I'm not even gonna vent and say why ,  there's no point really 😕.  My dad took me and Terry to get groceries & then went to the pet store for flea stuff for Nelly and Luna  . I saw this fish toy , I had to get it .  I also saw this catnip spray , all Nelly does is lick it she don't even play with the fish .  Thinking I should of bought the 30 doller fish that moves,  maybe she would play with it . Ended up going to Terry's friends house for super.  They had roast and I couldn't eat it so I had to go to to the store and buy myself something . Ended up getting chicken burgers for me . Then .. Alisha took my phone and took a shit tone if pictures of their cat .  Cute cat don't get me wrong , but everytime we go there she does it . This is one of the 20 pictures of the cat  I thought this one was cute  Had to share it :)  Thimmothy being a bump on a log  Payton playin...

 2o22.o8.20 (Saturday) - ...  Went outside to check on my plants  Found this bee on the flower my momma gave me for mother's day 💕  Honestly can't believe it's still alive  Tried to get another picture of the bee but it ended up flying away  🐝  . Today is very stressful ,  Gonna be so happy for it to be over ! I made two posts about why I'm stressed but not going to post them ,  don't need people mad at me when there already mad at me  😔  Other then that ... I geuss today was okay  LONG  but okay ?  .  I was going threw things in the back room and found a bunch of Islas old baby blankets and more vhs tapes  Kids are watching vhs tapes for the weekend . Hoping tomarrow is a better day 🙏  actully praying tomarrow is a better day ! Baby Isla popped up in my #TimeHop today , I don't remember what we were doing today , Joys of having a bad brain 🧠  😆 lol Isla was so chunky , She lost all her baby ...

 2o22.o8.19  -  wanted to give a strawberry update . Was looking threw my posts and noticed I posted about them when I planted them back in 2o21 but didn't give an update.  So here it is  🍓  I got 6 strawberry bushes now 4 dollerstore berry's  (2o21) 2 different ones from amazon (2o22)  🍓  These are my strawberry plants (2) from last year ,  I was happy they came back this year :) I want to separate them but Terry wants to leave them together because they produce alot of berry's.  Small berry's but ALOT of them . Kids are always eating the ripe ones every more as I'm watering them  🍓  The two on the outside are from last year and the one in the middle with the different colored leaves are planted this year .  🍓  This one is also from this year  It's got bigger berry's on it then the ones from last year witch is weird but I googled it and I geuss it's from different breeds of the berry . I don't know . lo...

 2o22.o8.19 (Friday) -  Click to Read Timmy's Eye Appointment These right here ... I was SO MAD 😠  The only reason why I'm posting about this is because it popped up in my #TimeHop today . I completely forgot about them because I don't know where my kids put them . Payed 20$ each (not including shipping&handling) , if I find the screen shots of them I'll post them . Ugh ! They were suposto be HUGE , NOT tiny . The bubble solution was empty also  (still have them, they kinda work) But not a website I'll trust again to be honest.  The boxes were damaged 😠  Update : (found the screen shots) Sorry it comes with an empty bubble container  But the one I got needed 3 batteries 🔋  Totally not worth the money to be honest  Ugh !

August 11th 2o22  10:50pm We are getting ready to move .  It's just up the street witch ain't far . Kinda glad to move out of this place , NOT gonna miss it at all . I'm am going to miss the yard tho 😢  . It's time for a change , I've been here sence 2017 and it's 2022 now . 5 years I believe.  Also going to be glad that my kids will be going to a different school , maybe this one will actually take there time and try to help Timmy . . I told my kids they have till October to have everything packed and ready to move , if there stuff ain't packed I'm just gonna toss it in Pappas truck and bring it to a thrift store . I already took the pictures off the walls , washed the walls and just have to putty over the holes where the pictures were .  And the stuff in my room is packed.  Keeping the kitchen & bathroom until the last minute.  Honestly don't know what to do with my plants.   Was thinking about brining some strawberry bushes to my dad'...

  My girls wanted to play with there lol dolls with water to see them colour change .  My boyfriend's girls comes over for the night . "Mom do we have to share" - Alisha  "Yes you have to be nice and try to share" - me "But what if they break a doll or lose something?" - Alisha "Then you tell them that they can't play with your stuff anymore" - me "Okay" - Alisha  They were fine playing , I didn't care what they did because it was outside and not inside the house . My boyfriend's kid kept taking stuff WITHOUT asking . Catina yells and tells me so I told her "if you can't ask to see if anyone is playing with it first then you can't play with their stuff"  She completely ignored me like always . So I checked the time and told them all it's bed time and to pack up .  Ugh ! What would you do ?  ... ... ...

I feel like I'm in a happy place right now,  I cant remember when the last time I was like this  It feels awesome :)  Now I just have to try and help Alisha threw her anxiety , its hard tho. Because I never had the help and dont know how to help her. So i got a book , it talks about fears and other stuff in a child's mind. But... I don't think she has fear,  shes smart and a brave girl who will challenge herself. Its more like people anxiety (dont want to be around them, dont want to talk to them and she pushes them away she would rather be alone sometimes) . I'll admit its hard, so I'm asking the system for help with it but to me it seems like they dont want to help. They want you to ask for help but then they choose to turn you down (if that makes sense) .  On a positive note , she has her eyore and talks to it , plays with it and carrys it everywhere she goes.   .....  Im just hoping she don't end up like me , shes too ...

Turns out Ali has anxiety ... That is why she don't talk to people. The pediatrician said that having her mental health worker back would benefit her because they built a trust together.  And Thimmothy, he has to get a x-ray done for his hips because the right side is a little different from his left. And he has ADD. I don't really know how to word it but the pediatrician said that having speech for three years should of helped by now but having his mental health worker back would be good for him also. Alot of tests are on the way. But at least its good to get them checked now instead of later.  On a positive note , my kids are happy and outgoing :)  ... My two kids goes to there dads tonight till Sunday. Dont know what to do this weekend lol

I've been honestly feeling alot better these past few days . I prolly already said that in my other post but meh ...  Ive noticed that me and my sister has a good relationship , a relationship that me and my mom should have. But at least I no I can count on her. I never thought me and my sister would be this close, only because I didnt like how she left the house when we lived in the county. But I finally knocked that wall down sence I know I can trust her again. My councler told me I should re connect with the people I used to and I did :) there awesome to hang around. They haven't met my kids yet tho because I have this trust issue with people. (Because of reasons) not going to make the same mistake twice. Some people do learn from there mistakes and some don't.  Ive learnt that trusting the wrong person could back fire! But also not trusting anyone could make you isolated too. Both of thoes mean alot to me. [If any of that makes sense] ... I'll admit...